Rectal Infuriator Hot Sauce

“RECTAL INFURIATOR” is the most challenging and mind-numbingly hot sauce known in the SARPiverse. It's a favorite among the wildest and most daring food enthusiasts, touted as the most explosive experience your taste buds (and other regions) will ever endure.

“It's the taste that'll make your guts dance!” (Commercial Slogan)

Price: 11.99 KS for a bottle

The RECTAL INFURIATOR was born in YE 41, within the rough-and-tumble kitchens of the boisterous outer colony of Hicksville Prime. Inspired by the tough, hardy, and humorous lifestyle of the planet's inhabitants - often called “Space Rednecks” - the original creators sought to create a hot sauce that embodied their macho, adventurous spirit.

Using a mysterious combination of the universe's hottest peppers, fortified with Hicksville Prime's native Capsaicin Vortex Chilies, they created a hot sauce so powerful it's been likened to a plasma grenade in the gut.

In YE 45.7, Dr. Poppy Pink and her roommates from the Resurgence (Kawa Euikoshi, Pidole Henitot, and Bidole) went out to eat at the Kakushi Nekoba¹⁾ where they ate very spicy hot wings with RECTAL INFURIATOR on them.

The RECTAL INFURIATOR hot sauce is as much a legend as it is a condiment. It comes in an old-school glass bottle, made tough to handle any kerfuffle. The label is either a pile of ingredients or a retro-styled display of a cowboy riding a rocket, his face frozen in an expression of unadulterated thrill, or perhaps absolute terror – it's hard to tell.

The sauce itself is a brilliant scarlet red, thick and menacing. The aroma hits your nostrils like a supernova, promising an interstellar experience of infernal heat and flavor.

The RECTAL INFURIATOR is not for the faint-hearted or mild-tongued. It has found its place in the toughest kitchens across the universe, where brave chefs add it to their dishes for that extra kick that takes the meal from “tasty” to “aetheric plasma.”

Its searing heat and robust flavor make it perfect for barbeque, marinades, and adding a hot punch to your favorite meals. But remember: Use with caution! Only a couple of drops are enough to launch your tastebuds into a flaming orbit. Too much, and you might find yourself experiencing the sauce's namesake effect.

The RECTAL INFURIATOR is designed to add a dash of humor and machismo to your Star Army Roleplaying experience. It provides fun opportunities for character interaction, whether it's a cooking competition, an initiation ritual, a test of courage, or a hilarious prank.

Keep in mind, though, that the RECTAL INFURIATOR is just as much a narrative device as it is an in-universe condiment. While it can be a source of comical misadventures, its use should always be in good fun and not to cause genuine discomfort or harm to characters (or players).

In essence, the RECTAL INFURIATOR is the embodiment of a daredevil's challenge, a humorous nod to our inherent desire to test our limits. It's the culinary version of a cowboy on a rocket, riding into the unknown with a reckless grin.

Wes created this article on 2023/05/25 19:05.